Side: Yuki
"—And that's the situation. Do your best."
"'Do your best', my ass-ssu!! Are you making fun of me? You definitely are, Boss-ssu!!"
"Come on, I really think you can do it."
"No way-ssu! No matter how you look at it, we're facing 2,500 soldiers. And you want just our Goblin squad to hold them off-ssu!?"
"It's not like I'm telling you to completely wipe them out or hold the line for a whole year. You just need to draw the enemy's attention for about an hour or so."
"We'll die-ssu! We're seriously gonna die! How cruel! Sending us off to die is just too cold-hearted-ssu!"
"Look, didn't I tell you what I found out when I appraised them? Their leader, the Wind Knight Princess, is the highest level at 72. Everyone else is around level 30. On our side, your level is over 300, Steve. And even your subordinate goblins are between 150 and 200. Act now, because our numbers are incredibly high!"
"Don't try to pitch it to me like a late-night infomercial-ssu! The sheer difference in numbers is too insane-ssu! You're always the one telling us to consider the worst-case scenario, Boss! Even if we're over level 300, our base racial stats are so low that we still get our butts kicked by Seraria-neesan-ssu!"
"You beat her every now and then, don't you?"
"Only every now and then-ssu! Fine, if that's how it's gonna be, give us guns-ssu! If you do that, I'll wipe them all out for you-ssu!"
"Idiot. Doing something like that will make us stand out way too much. Modern weaponry is strictly reserved for dungeon defense. For anything outside, we conform to this continent's current civilization level. That means swords and magic."
"Gyaaaaa! What kind of outdated thinking is that!? Swords and magic aren't even trendy anymore these days-ssu!"
"Whether they're fashionable or not, we have to do it. We need to establish our position clearly."
For this operation, we had to use a force of around 150 to face off against the Wind Princess's army of 2,500.
If we used modern weapons, it would be an effortless victory, but that would leave behind a mountain of future complications. This applies both to the demi-humans watching us from the rear to see how things shake out, and to the invading imperial army.
If we relied on firearms, both sides would just claim that we only won because we used weird, unfair weapons. To make sure everything goes smoothly moving forward, we need to make them believe we won through sheer, unadulterated strength.
In reality, using modern weapons is a form of strength in itself. However, defeated people generally try to find excuses for their loss rather than admitting their own lack of capability. While identifying tactical differences is correct for military analysis, hiding behind those differences as an excuse doesn't change the actual outcome.
If our objective was to aggressively conquer this new continent through sheer tyranny, that would be one thing. But unfortunately for them, that isn't our goal at all.
That's why we hit the enemy head-on—facing them in a scenario where they think they have the absolute advantage, only to thoroughly crush them. It forces the enemy to realize that the fundamental gap in our base power is simply insurmountable.
Unlike being suddenly vaporized by incomprehensible modern artillery, they will perfectly comprehend their defeat. They will understand the absolute, terrifying difference in raw strength.
Furthermore, the fence-sitting demi-humans who are currently packing up their bags because they assume our tiny force has zero chance of winning will completely lose the right to complain or oppose us after seeing this result.
...At least, that was the grand, logical explanation I gave to Steve. And yet...
"Nope-ssu. Even if this area is considered a safe zone level-wise, nobody knows what might happen on the New Continent-ssu. And that Wind Princess Knight? We don't even know what her magic sword can do-ssu. There are way too many unknowns. I can't tell my subordinates to become bait under those conditions-ssu."
"Seriously... who did you inherit this from? This absolute, obsessive fixation on safety protocols?"
"You, Boss."
Eh? Am I really like this?
"But look, Steve, if your squad doesn't draw them in from the front, the rest of us won't be able to flank them. Do you have a better alternative?"
"Then at least let Riel-neesan stand on the front lines with us-ssu. Having even one more powerhouse with us would make me feel way safer."
"No can do. Riel, Tori, and Kaya are beastfolk, so they absolutely have to be part of the ambush squad."
"Why's that-ssu?"
"Because if they're out in the open, those fence-sitters in the back will immediately say, 'We only managed to stop the enemy's vanguard because our fellow demi-humans were there.'"
"Ohhh! So the problem isn't the enemy—it's the people behind us-ssu."
"Exactly. But by that same logic, Ria, Mobu, Aslin, and I can't just openly group up with your squad either. We have to make it look like the ambush was carried out strictly by our human mercenary band."
"So if we don't do it that way, the lazy onlookers will throw a tantrum and claim the victory belongs entirely to Riel-neesan's side-ssu?"
"Yeah. It's always better to take the path that minimizes future headaches, right? Plus, we need to make ourselves look as easy to attack as possible to entice them. Between a unit composed entirely of goblins and a unit mixed with humans, which one do you think the imperial army will be more cautious against?"
"If we want the ambush to succeed, it's definitely better if our vanguard consists only of my squad, since we look incredibly easy to look down on-ssu. After all, even on this continent, goblins are at the absolute bottom of the power hierarchy. The enemy will happily charge in to sweep us aside, assuming they can immediately move on to support their rear or march straight into the village-ssu."
Because they are a squad of goblins, Steve's unit functions as the ultimate, flawless bait.
In terms of actual combat capability against the Wind Knight Princess's army, even if they fought a hundred times, Steve's squad alone would win ninety-eight of them. The only two losses would be from Steve and his guys doing something stupid, like slipping, falling over, and cracking their own heads open.
In terms of levels, the only person capable of inflicting a genuinely fatal wound on Steve's men is the princess equipped with the magic sword. Anyone else might manage to leave a bruise at best, but they won't do any real damage unless our guys just stand there and let them chop away.
After all, every single one of our goblins is outfitted with a full set of broken, cheat-tier equipment custom-made by Narjia to look like completely ordinary, mundane gear.
"Sigh... fine, I get it-ssu. If we end up dying, just make sure to leave a nice Caesar salad by our graves."
"That's literally just your favorite food... Also, you're a goblin, so shouldn't you be asking for meat or something? Why are your tastes overlapping with Eris's?"
"Even goblins think vegetables taste delicious-ssu! Besides, it's not my fault my favorite food happens to match your wife's. Honestly, I'm pretty sure Eris-oneesan's absolute favorite food is actually you, Boss."
"What kind of favorite food is that? I'm not even a food."
"I don't know-ssu. But I'm pretty sure she views you as a food-ssu."
I'm fairly certain you mean that in a completely different context... Eris really is a force of nature at night, after all.
"Let's just drop that topic right there. Either way, you're on board now, right?"
"Yeah, yeah. Guess we've gotta do it-ssu."
"Perfect. In that case, here's your reward."
"Hold on-ssu. If we're doing all this extra work for the exact same salary, my men are gonna riot-ssu."
"Don't worry. It's something way better than money."
As I say that, Aslin and the others walk into the room. They are actively participating in the strategy this time.
The other wives gave me a massive earful, scolding me that keeping them tucked away in the safe zone forever was spoiling them way too much. Therefore, having Steve act as bait this time is also a calculated move to ensure Aslinn and her group can safely gain some practical experience.
"Oya? If it's Aslin-sama-ssu!"
Since Aslin is technically the one who named him, Steve treats her with a level of deep respect that far exceeds how he treats me... Oi.
"I didn't really understand all the complicated stuff," Aslin said, "but Steve and everyone are going to work hard, right?"
"Yes Ma'am..."
"Un. Thank you so much. Good luck, Steve!"
"""WE WILL!!"""
The other commander goblins standing right behind Steve offer a roaring, synchronized shout of compliance.
"But please don't overdo it, okay? Let's all come back together safely and have a delicious dinner!"
"""UNDERSTOOD!!"""
"Oh, and if possible, let's try not to kill the enemy soldiers either. I'm sure their families would be very sad and cry if they died."
"""WE UNDERSTAND!!"""
The moment Aslin finished speaking, the goblins scattered.
Moments later, angry shouting echoed from all directions.
"Listen up, everyone! This entire battle depends entirely on how hard we push ourselves!"
"Aslin-sama told us we're all having a delicious dinner together when we get back!"
"Do not dare die out there! Don't you dare do anything that would make Aslin-sama cry!"
""""Sir, yes, sir!""""
And just like that, the goblins' morale skyrocketed to its absolute peak.
As a result, the Goblin squad completely obliterated the elite heavy cavalry unit, including the Wind Princess herself. Thanks to their flawless performance, our ambush squad was able to systematically shatter the enemy's main force in the rear with total leisure, pulling down their central headquarters in record time. Naturally, not a single enemy soldier managed to escape the perimeter.
Well, considering the fact that the rest of us were part of the ambush squad, I guess our group was technically the main force all along.
Now then... I wonder how I should handle our awkward reunion with the Wind Princess.
